Epiphanies

The last few months I've had quite a few epiphanies about who I am, patterns in my choices, etc. None of them have been flattering to myself so I know I have a lot of work to do. Not a fun time in my life but I'm hoping all this work will lead to a better place.

But enough of the serious stuff. Yesterday I had a couple more FUN epiphanies:

Why my taciturn friend makes me laugh

I have a friend in my life who drives me bonkers. Sometimes I don't know why I put up with him and his surly ways, nor know why his teasing rarely fails to make me laugh. I finally figured it out! His sense of humor is very like my younger son's who comes across as morose but has an incredibly quick wit. He'll say things to me that I KNOW others would find insulting, but I know where they're coming from and what the intentions are and he makes me laugh. Same with the friend.

On to the second epiphany....

I WANT A SUGAR DADDY!

Or a Sugar Mommy is fine, too.

Really, I do. I caught some of Dr. Phil the other day where the focus was on a 40-yr-old rich doctor who is in a relationship with a poor fresh-out-of-highschool girl. (They even met on an online dating service set up for sugar daddies. Eyes rolling now. There was a whole lot of outrage against the allegedly gold-digging girl. Not enough concern about what SHE was getting herself into. But I digress.)

I'm tired of the financial struggle. So I, too, want someone who will buy me cars and first-class flights and clothes and jewelry and iPods. (In return, I promise great mind-blowing sex on a regular basis. Seems a fair trade.)

Of course, that would mean I'd have to BE a woman who would attract such a person into my life. Nevermind the lobotomy but also plastic surgery, weight loss, fountain of youth, etc.

Is that too much to ask?

Apparently not. I asked my taciturn friend if he would be my sugar daddy. He's promised me that when he wins the lottery, I've got it. What a sweet guy.

Nothing wrong with that.

(I told my older son about this and his eyes lit up and he said "Sure! I want one too!" Don't we all deserve sugar daddies now and then?)