Tuesday, April 18, 2006

Ow! Ow! Ow!

I've managed to lose a bit of weight the last few months through conscious, healthy eating choices. And I've been active just in my daily life. But I haven't been doing any real exercising for a while.

No one would know to look at me, but I like exercising. I get almost immediate benefits from it in terms of mood and ease of stress and, if I'm wise in how I exercise, it helps the FM pain in the long run. (And that's definitely needed.... it's gotten to the point again when my soft, light comforter's weight is resulting in too much pain at night.) I like being more physically flexible and just generally feeling better about myself. That doesn't even take into account any eventual weight loss or health benefits.

But I stopped many months ago, even before Michael died, largely because of pain. (I remember discussing it with him as I was worried I wouldn't be able to keep up with our usual pace for the next planned vacation together.) I enjoy walking but after a while it can start hurting more and more, not less and less. I like aerobics but can experience the same thing. I can't do the water work other FM folks do due to skin problems and an allergy to chlorine (okay, and shyness about being in public in my bathing suit). I gave up bike riding and other pursuits years ago. I have to continuously change what I do to keep ahead of the pain and I guess I just lost the energy to do that for a while.

But I restarted again today, starting with some stretching and the beginnings of light aerobics. It feels reeeeeeeally good to feel motivated again and I will continue. I managed over seven minutes today (that's how you have to start; it's always a fine balance, doing enough and pushing yourself a bit but not overdoing so you're in so much pain you can't repeat it the next day) and will keep increasing it over the weeks and months to come, while remaining otherwise active as I move around the house, run errands, do chores, etc. I know from years of experience that I will eventually get to 40 minutes of hard aerobics and then hard strengthening exercises plus some walking hopefully and I'm patient.

But ow! those seven minutes hurt!


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