Sam

Inspired by Denise and others who have been doing the "whatisthisdoinginmyhousemondays" for a while now, I'm joining in on it this week.





This is Sam.

I was reminded about Sam when a friend made an agreement with her dieing friend that a certain kind of memento would come her way to let the surviving friend know the dead friend was okay. I was upset I'd made no such agreement with Michael. (I know, the things we beat ourselves up for are pretty dumb sometimes.) Then I remembered Sam.

A few mornings after Michael died I opened up my front door to find this ceramic turtle, about 5/6 inches in height, sitting there looking up at me with a goofy grin. He didn't belong there and I'd never seen him before in my life.

Now, I expect what REALLY happened is someone was out for their morning walk, found the turtle on the road near my lawn and assumed it must belong to me and decided to be neighborly and set him on my front porch. (I live in a neighborhood where that could happen.)

But what I chose to believe because I couldn't figure out for sure how he got there was that he was meant to be there and maybe, just maybe, it was a gift from the beyond in my time of need.

So why a turtle? Not a clue really. Had it been a frog it would have made sense. I like frogs and Michael and I had a LOT of inside jokes about frogs starting from the beginning of our relationship and carried through the years. There were frog songs, frog stuffed animals and tokens, frog mouse for the computer, all gifts from him as part of the ongoing joke.

But this was a turtle.

Okay. Next came the search for the meanings of turtles and there's a lot out there but no consensus. Could mean healing and balance and courage or a gazillion other things. Of course there's the whole 'slow and steady wins the race' thing reinforcing the one-day-at-a-time philosophy. Hmmm.

Then I saw a repeat episode of the Gilmore Girls, a show we both loved. There's one scene in the 2nd or 3rd season where Emily decides to send some workmen to Lorelei's house and tells them the key is under the turtle at the front door. Workmen couldn't find the dang turtle. That's because it's a frog on the front porch, not a turtle. Aha! Could Michael have made the same mistake and sent me a turtle when he meant to send a frog? *LOL*

Whatever the explanation, I just like the look of him. And I named him Sam because it's a friendly, not-to-bright name (sorry to all the Sams out there) that seems to fit. And he made me smile when there was so much darkness.

I left him on the front porch for a while in case a neighbor missed him from their yard and reclaimed him. He eventually was brought in to the front entrance and then into my office when we redecorated/painted in the entrance. Now he has migrated to the closest end of my fireplace mantle in my family room, right above where I sit here at my computer.

And he still makes me smile. At his grin and at how our minds will work when reaching for comfort in life's little surprises.